Starting

Photo credit: Kyle Loftus at kalvisuals.com

I have trouble starting things. I have trouble finishing them too. But we’ll focus on one trouble area for now: starting.

The thing about starting is that it isn’t all that of a big deal that I make of it. I think I purposely build it up so much that when, and if, I finally start the starting, I’m anticipating trumpets playing, I’m expecting loved ones praising and screaming “bravo”s, I’m low-key expecting special treatment across the board just because I finally started this project or hobby or study or whatever it is that I’ve been meaning to since literally forever. But, no, the ground doesn’t shake. The sun rises as normal the next day. My co workers continue to behave as if nothing happened. I mean, seriously? How dare you? How dare you ignore me and not celebrate the gigantic fact that I took such a significant step ?!

It’s all in my head, I realize. Both, the fact that it’s significant that I finally started what I wanted as well as that I’ve kept stalling for a host of apparently all too important reasons.

I treat myself to a cupcake and settle…

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